Ink Unfiltered

Where veins bleed verses, and wounds birth metaphors. Welcome to my sanctuary—a place where raw emotions collide with ink-stained vulnerability.

Victory, defeat, a relentless tide,

Euphoria drowned in a sea of despair,

Anguish, the undercurrent pulling me

, Resentment, the depths where I gasp for air.

The English language, a vessel of my tears,

each word is a drop of sorrow on my soul,

A canvas smeared with the hues of pain,

A story dark, a silent scream untold.

Betrayal, a venom, bitter on my tongue,

A stain of distrust, lingering and vile,

while abuse whispers secrets to the moon,

A testament to a life torn apart, and you, dear heart,

your rugged edges are etched like letters,

inscribed upon the tombstone of my pain,

A silent witness to my fractured existence

, A canvas painted with shades of grief

Anguish is the only current that carries me.

I lay my head down, seeking elusive rest.

Days without sleep, my mind a tempest I become my own bully, relentless and cruel, A playground where scars bloom, a twisted duel.

“Fatty, you’re getting old,” Your all bones taunts persist, No one loves you, they insist, a venomous twist. Yet as my head touches the pillow’s embrace, A sigh of relief—though not mine—fills the space.

From underneath, silent laughter unfolds. My mind is a labyrinth of shadows and pearls. Are these tricks, or demons clawing at my core? Nails on a chalkboard, my restless soul’s uproar. In my own darkness, I seek solace, in vain, Even rest eludes me—a relentless refrain.

Time is of the essence, relentless and swift,

yet I pretend my hourglass is full, a deceptive gift.

Minutes, hours, days—weeks blur into years, tic-tock, missing games, school plays, and cheers. Even birthdays slip away,

like sand through cracks, Who am I to deprive them of a mother’s tracks?

“You’re selfish,” the inner voice accuses, Or perhaps I lack remorse.

Wet pillows greet me at dawn’s cruel light, demons as bedfellows, relentless in their

fight. Drained and conquered, I admit defeat, Their whispers echo, relentless and discreet.

What’s wrong with me, I ask the void, This lack of empathy, this heart unmoored. Once warm bodies, now mere echoes, their rhythmic heartbeats fading into shadows.

I miss the little giggles, those tiny feet, Dancing on hardwood floors, a melody sweet. innocent eyes, trusting and wide, yet I, their guardian, make them cry.

Am I an empty vessel, devoid of soul? I was supposed to protect them, yet I’ve lost control. The home I guard feels fragile, worn, as time slips through my desperate fingers.

Dance With Darkness

Life's cruel setup, a rigged game, Played me, spun me in his web of deceit. He was A beacon of light, an ember of hope, Igniting my veins with life.

 His laughter—a twisted symphony, He wore a mask of charm, wrapped evil in silk, adorned it with laughter a velvet touch, Smooth words that dripped like honey, Cloaked in pretty lies, seductive whispers, feeding on my trust.

You chewed the little bit innocence I had left, and spat out my dreams, Leaving me hollow, a vessel. I sought love—naive, relentless— But he, the architect of my undoing, His tongue—the weapon of a master, Twisting facts, spinning illusions,

 A magician of half-truths and false vows, Leaving me lost, gasping for clarity. And control—he craved it like oxygen, His own self-reference the highest law, Ignoring feedback, rejecting accountability, A puppeteer pulling my strings, my autonomy. 

He played on my sympathies, Demanding mercy while giving none, Warmth, forgiveness, intimacy—his demands! I’ve lingered in those same worn-out rooms. , Faces morphing, years blending, Yet the script remains unchanged.

 How long can one sit with darkness? It seeps through the cracks, insidious, Like glue binding fractured pieces, A slow erosion of virtue, a corrosion of soul. You can’t toy with darkness and emerge unscathed. It stains your marrow, twists your compass, And when you see it— though it may look appealing, don't be fooled by its outward appearance.

In the grip of addiction, our relationship fades, Laughter and trust, now swept away. The camaraderie once strong, now a thread, As addiction's shadow spreads dread.

I stand by, helpless and torn, Mourning the bond that now seems worn. Yet within my heart, hope remains, A beacon of light amidst the chains. Pain grips my heart when I look at you, A stranger now, where love once grew.

. Why can't you meet my gaze, stop this shaking, Slow down, please — our hearts are breaking.

Spend time with us, the family you miss, It's like a record on repeat, a haunting melody, You're my pretty little poison, a bittersweet felony. You call in the night, tears that plead, I drop everything, hoping you'll be freed. But by the next night, you're back in that place, Leaving me wondering why you lie to my face? Don't you know that the truth is a delicate dance?

Oh, how you weary my spirit, my essence, How can I ease your mind? bring peace to your soul, bring back its presence? I feel useless, worthless, unable to mend, this endless cycle, will it ever end? Like a bright star, you're a beacon in the night, The room dims when you leave, stealing the light.

I'm left in darkness alone, reminiscing, Memories and moments we once knew, now missing. A heart once vibrant, now quiet, subdued,

I'll always embrace your imperfections, Without judgment, with only affection. Just know I can't exist without you near, My love, my pain, the addict I hold dear.



Open my eyes at birth—the world a blur, Bright lights searing through innocence.
Lost, cold, confused—tiny whispers echos.
To scared to move, I cling to safety.

My bed becomes a sanctuary, a cocoon, where eyelids meet in quiet surrender. But wait! A distant sound—a creaking floor, Footsteps approaching, a nightmare unfolding.

The doorknob turns—an intruder, Breath held, heart racing, sweat on my brow. Footsteps approach, a presence I remember. Not tonight, I plead silently, my sisters close, Their presence a fragile shield against the unknown.

A shadow stretches across my room, Its edges sharp as letters carved in stone. Fear, like ink, stains the blanket of my soul, and in that darkness, my vision takes shape. And in that darkness a piercing cry, a silent plea. Paralyzed by fear, a stillness like death.

A darkness that swallows, a suffocating shroud. Fear, a poison, seeping into my being. Intruder!!! thief of light, how dare you come, to steal my sight!!

How dare you intruder, who do you think you are? Taking my vision, my chance at purity? You've corrupted me, taken a part of me, you've obstructed my view, a piece of me now lost, Forever searching, for what's forever gone.

Because of you, my touch turned frigid, void of grace,
Proper affection withheld, in apathy I've grown.
Bitter and naive, blind to love's gentle means,
You've cast a shadow where empathy should dwell,
Leaving me with only the harshest truths to unveil.
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